Meeting new people is always challenging for introverts. Due to their shy and reserved nature, they mostly struggle with the dilemma of how to meet other introverts. However, it is not like they don’t want to meet new people. I mean, who doesn’t want quality relationships in their life? It is just when it comes to meeting new people; introverts have different mechanisms and expectations than extroverts.
There are a few ways that introverts can meet other introverts. One way is to attend introverted-focused events or groups. Another way is to use online services or social media platforms that cater to introverts. Finally, introverts can look for introverted friends through mutual acquaintances or friends of friends.
How could Introverts meet new people?
Matches are made in heaven, but introverts would want the love of their life to teleport to their living room with flowers and snacks, of course! If you’re an introvert craving some human connection and looking forward to meeting new people, here are a few tips you can follow:
1. Let your Family and Friends take the reins of your social life (sometimes)
One of the most traditional ways to meet new people is through family dinners or gatherings for introverts which they care to attend sometimes. So, when a family member calls you to attend a birthday party, you might want to consider accepting the offer. You may find another introvert in a socially awkward situation who you might save and have a new friend for life.
Another way introverts can meet new people is through their extrovert friends. For an extrovert trying to help their introverted friends, you could ask other friends to bring along an introverted individual. A supportive environment with a gentle nudge could prove enough for a couple of introverts to overcome their barrier of self-containment. If you have an extrovert friend, they’re probably going to tag you along to the parties, and if you are in the mood to meet other introverts, that could be your chance to find that special someone.
2. Volunteer activities
Being part of the process that gives back to society is often one of the best ways to feel connected with the peace within your inner self. If you love to do charity work, joining some volunteer activities increases your exposure to the outer world. You could join an organization conducting volunteer activities or participate in group volunteer projects. It would be a good way to interact with people who share the same vision as yours. Maybe you’ll meet like-minded people and hit it off with someone!
3. Leave the notion of “what’s next?”
What now? That is what one should be focusing on, the present. Being in the moment frees you of the impending doom that comes with thoughts of the future and crippling regrets that fill the void of the past. If you were not able to talk to someone at that one particular time or said something unwanted, let it not impose on your thoughts or emotions. Rather, it should become a driving factor towards improvement for the next time when such a moment arrives.
Introverts tend to over-evaluate situations, especially interaction with new individuals often makes them worry about where this relationship is going. A piece of advice to the overthinking introverts would be not to go frenzy when someone is getting close to you. Give it some time and let the time unfolds how that relationship is going to be evolved. That calm composure and going along with the flow will help you better focus on developing a nurturing bond, and there you may get your soulmate for life!
4. Online platforms for introverts
Social media is the best way for introverts to interact with other people without leaving the comfort of their personal space. There are introverts who spend most of their free time conversing with people online or looking at their posts and what they share. There are tons of websites for introverts to meet other introverts where they can interact and find each other relatable without any judgment.
Some of the popular groups and platforms that introverts can use are
- Reddit community for introverts
- Facebook group for all the quiets ones
- Linked groups for introverts
- Meetup site for introverts
- SilentBookClub website
Also, there are multiple online dating websites curated especially for introverts who couldn’t muster up the courage in a social setting to approach someone. These websites are introvert heavens, and you might find someone with the same frequency and vibes as yours.
5. College/ University/ Workplace
The academic setting is the best place for introverts to meet other people, albeit somewhat forcefully. Often times you are required to submit assignments and projects in collaboration with other class fellows or participate in group study. For introverts making acquaintances in such an environment proves easier because there is a matter of mutual trust when grades are on the line. Try to interact with the class fellow who’s showing interest in talking to you instead of running home as soon as class ends, and you might make a long-lasting bond with them..
6. Being part of a community
Good community, good people, help you get your act together, take care of you, and enhance the circle of life. As introverts usually avoid social parties and going to clubs where there are high chances of finding new people, they can join certain introvert-friendly communities. There could be a community near you that organizes poems or book recitals weekly. You could attend them and find other introverts like you. Or you could join an art class where most people express their inner worlds through their art, and you may find your art/soul buddy.
You may also check Making Friends As An Introvert to learn more about how you can make friends. Introverted Intuition is also something that make spike your interest.
What qualities of introverts make it difficult for them to meet new people?
Due to varying personality attributes, introverted people find it difficult to meet and find people as compared to extroverts. These qualities could be elaborated as:
1. Shy Nature
Their shy and reserved nature makes it difficult for them to interact with new people and build new friendships as smoothly as extroverts. Lack of self confidence also plays a big role.
2. Lack of Initiative
People with an introverted nature rarely take the initiative to start a conversation with a stranger or to socialize in gatherings which creates a hindrance for them to meeting new people.
3. Having different expectations
Another reason why introverts find it troublesome to make new friends is that they have different expectations from people. The idea of making small talk doesn’t resonate with them so much, as much as the deep talks excite them. Where most people would be indulging in gossiping, introverts would love to talk about their ideas, inner world, emotions, perspectives on life experiences and whatnot!
4. Need for a deeper connection
As introverted personalities are mostly empaths in nature, they like to connect with people on another level. Instead of talking randomly with multiple acquaintances, they’d like to have deep conversations with their two to three best friends, and they’ll feel fulfilled. Most Introverts have best friends from school or college time, and they don’t feel it necessary to make new ones. Their preference for closely-knit friends makes it difficult for them to make new friends or meet new people.
5. Socializing can be draining
Another big reason why introverts have a hard time finding new people is that social situations drain them quickly. After socializing for a certain period of time, introverts need to recharge their social batteries to gain their strengths again.
6. Solitude
Due to the above-mentioned reasons, most introverts like to spend their time in their solitude because it doesn’t require them to get out of their comfort zone, let alone explain their expectations.
But as life transitions, they might feel the need to meet new people, build new connections and form healthy bonds with others.
Introvert qualities that attracts other people towards them
Even though introverts are misinterpreted as socially anxious people, they possess certain qualities which make them attractive and irresistible, attracting other people to their charisma.
1. Composed attitude
Along with their reserved nature, introverts are mostly calm and composed in their nature. They behave and cater to things and situations quite gently. It is their composed and gentle aura that captivates others. You would find most introverts as soft-spoken people who rarely lose their cool in public situations, even in difficult scenarios. Their characteristic of calmness is what intrigues people and attracts others to them.
2. Reflective and self-aware
Introverts are quite aware of their own selves and possess a character of insight. Most of the time, they’re attuned to their emotions. Their emotional intelligence makes them more deliberate in engaging with other people. Introverts possess an inquisitive nature which makes them explore the situations and people around them more deeply. Their deep-rooted conversations and ability to create more meaningful bonds create an impact on people, and they crave more of their presence.
3. Enjoying their own company/ Maintaining a curious personality
It’s human nature to be curious about what’s not known. Who isn’t attracted to a loner? People want to explore the mystery of the unknown, and introverts maintain a curious personality that appeals to other people. You cannot gauge what an introvert is thinking or what’s going on inside their minds, which makes them more intriguing. They hardly spill any beans about their inner thought processes, which leads people to inquire more about them, and they would want to know more about introverts.
It’s a general misconception that introverts are boring or not as exciting people as extroverts. Once you get close to introverts and seek their inner world, you’ll find them to be the most amazing and interesting personalities.
4. Good listeners and empaths
We all want an ear to listen to and a shoulder to cry on! Most of the time, people like to talk and rarely listen to others. In contrast, introverts possess the qualities of active listeners. You can rant to them about anything, and they’ll be all ears, listening to you intently, which makes them more attractive to other people.
Introverts are gifted with the qualities of empathy and compassion. They’ll understand the deep-lying emotions from the conversations, which makes people want to engage more with them. People feel heard and understood while talking to them, and that creates an attraction toward introverts.
5. Care about other people’s needs
When it comes to catering to others’ needs, introverts are quite exceptional at that. As they are compassionate and caring, introverts are always considerate about what other people need. Do you know a friend who comes up with a coffee whenever you have a deadline to meet? Or always brings you your comfort food when you’re distressed? Have you met a stranger on a bus who gave you his seat just because you were carrying a baby? That might be an introvert caring for your need without you even saying it. Their compassionate and tender nature is what makes them more attractive and irresistible.
Conclusion
Introverts usually find it difficult to meet new people due to their shy and reserved nature. But putting a little effort and getting a bit out of their comfort zone could pave the ways for them to meet other introverts who are just waiting like them to be seen and heard. And who knows, following these tips might get you the dream partner you’ve always been yearning for!
Let us know in the comments which tips were helpful for you, and you’re surely going to try them.
Hadiqa Fatima is a clinical psychologist and content writer. She’s been working in field for 3 years and possess a great deal of interest in personality studies. She’s also creating psychological awareness via her content.
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